We are terrible for each other...

...and yes, we are a disaster.
But tell me your heart doesn't race for a hurricane or a burning building.
I'd rather die terrified, than live forever.

Sad enough to say that...

...alone I could barely light a match
but together we could burn this place down.

Hello to the forgotten

So...

It's been roughly four months since anyone has posted on here...obviously, it's been way too long.

Since one of us was in Sweden for three months, and the other dealing with quite a mound of personal stuff I will apologize for the lack of updating. It might seem like it would be easier for the two of us to write because of the situations we were both in; one experiencing an almost never ending battle with culture shock, the other battling his own personal demons. However, writing obviously never came easy. I would like to say that within the next six months some major progress should start taking place. So be sure to keep yourselves posted.

There, now that that is out of the way:

The last four months of my life have been unbelievable. I've been fortunate enough to see things I never thought I would and I feel blessed that I've been able to. Yes, it was incredibly difficult to plan the trip and then adjust to the lifestyle, but looking back I feel a sense of accomplishment that I've never had before. I'm happy that I pushed myself through this, and I'm grateful for everyone that pushed me to do it, and supported me throughout it.

I have never felt more patriotic than I do now, sure I know that if I became a citizen of Sweden and lived there the rest of my life I would get used to it, but I never plan on doing that and I'm incredibly happy to be back home. There's just somethings that I've become used to - some small seemingly insignificant things that I missed while I was away - Twist off beer caps, good white bread, knowing that my cashier would speak English and be able to understand what I'm saying. In three months I realized there are so many things that I should be grateful for in my life no, not just the three things I listed, but honest, meaningful things. I am truly blessed.

I feel like I have learned more about myself in three months than in the past 22 years of my life. It's something that I never thought I could do.

Now, I don't know if it's the sappy music playing from the Godzilla movie in the background, but I feel as though I've been overly mushy with this. I guess overall I wanted to say thank you to the people that have helped me in the past few years of my life, especially the last three months.

Now with that said, it's time to re-adjust to my normal life and begin creating this album.

What's one thing you want to see before you die?

Jack's ability to be overly sappy.

The musings of fickle hearts

It's been a while I know.

My life has gone from settled to an absolute wtfbbq of crazy ass happenings.


I'll be posting again soon.

Peace my bitches. (Yes you are my bitches regardless of if you like it or not)

Words of wisdom

Its only after you've lost everything that you are free to do anything.

 

--Jack's regret

The Id, The Ego and The notion that somehow there's something more to life that I'm missing

I need a break, a vacation from this madness. I can't take my mind off of her. I can't stay away. My mind bounces like the rubber balls of children from one expected conclusion to the next.  Why am I doing this? Why can't I stop? What makes her all that important anyway? Well fuck you mind. This is your own fault this time. You got yourself into this mess and your logic is not bailing you out. You've had ample time to turn and go. But you can't can you? Are you weak are you that shallow that you can turn your gaze to others without thinking of her again? Go ahead, play these games day in and day out but you are just falling uphill. You are destined for greatness but Your heart screams bloody murder.  This is the beginning of the end but you have along road ahead yet. Get used to this feeling of emptiness mixed with the gentle flavor of a broken man for its not fading soon.

 

It's 5 in the morning and my mind burns with the fires of a thousand stars. I can't seem to make sense of the simplest things. The obvious is stated but it becomes far more complex. Something alien. It's familiar, these feelings I know them but I can't seem to comprehend them. I can't form words that do them justice. My downfall is my ability to blow things up and change them into atrocities against my own reason. I am Man. I am my own apocalypse. Welcome to the gallows of a shaken man's dreams. Fears lurk, stalk, hunt down what was once cherished. Fears bring the worst out of the most constant unwavering feelings. They are  something more, something less, something that is nothing. All  of this effort and time is wasted upon myself. The wasteland of my own thought strands my consciousness. I want to be alone but I can't stay away. Push me away for my own good but I know that won't happen.  I'll be nudged just far enough so I lay between self awareness and happiness. This is where hope comes to die. The scent of broken dreams and unfinished thoughts waft about burning the lungs. I can't seem to find a way out. Here I shall set up camp to fend off the intruders. I may be lost but hopefully I won't be able to find myself.

 

--Jack's inability to keep things simple.